Saturday, February 21, 2015

Pregnancy, giving birth and happy endings

So on our 3rd year as a medical student, we are suppose to do regular visits to a pregnant lady's house till she gives birth, as part of our course. I shall not do a report here on my experience cause I will have to do a graded report soon, and if I write anything remotely similarly, I will be accused of plagiarizing myself. I did not expect much from this at first. I thought I have been numbed towards the concept of pregnancy because my sister-in-law and sister have been pregnant before, and even though I have not been beside them while they were pregnant, I sort of know what was going on. We also learned about the process of pregnancy last year. So I thought, there can't be anything new in this!

I've visited her once when she was 30 weeks into her pregnancy and my partner visited her another time while she was still pregnant. Tomorrow will be our last visit to her place because she has finally given birth to a healthy baby boy! I had not much feeling about this visit initially till I read an article on facebook this morning. You can read it here.

When we talk about pregnant ladies, it's more common to talk about what colour the nursery should be, what colour the baby jumpsuits should be, what diapers to use or what milk powder will result in kids with the highest IQ etc. There are always so much joy and anticipation for the coming of this new being, even when you are just remotely related to this baby. The fact is, pregnancy and giving birth successfully have become such a common thing since labour was medicalised. Many people have taken for granted that it is actually a very dangerous process. A mother has to risk her life going through this painful process (thousand times more painful than any regular period pain), to bring another human into this world (while the dad watches). When the baby is born, he lets out a cry as a sign of life, everyone's happy and they live happily ever after. However, not every pregnancy is smooth and not every pregnancy will end in a happy delivery, even when most of them were filled with so much hope and anticipation. And when that happy ending doesn't happen, the disappointment is heartbreaking to experience and definitely heart-wrenching to learn even learn about as a bystander. Then people try to sweep it under the carpet, vow to never talk about it anymore and let time heal.

That story has definitely changed my view of 'pregnancy is always a happy thing', but that doesn't make pregnancy a bad thing. It makes me more grateful and sincerely happy for those mothers who have safely deliver their bundle of joy; it makes me really want to go up and give them a huge hug and pat them on the back for the job well done. While I was preparing gifts for the lady and her newborn that I will be visiting tomorrow, I couldn't help but be sincerely happy for her and grateful that this baby has come home safely.

Can't wait for tomorrow! :)

On the side note, Happy Chinese New Year!



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